Posted by: beansai | April 17, 2008

Journal Entry #16: Graduation Glory

    I mentioned in one of my regular posts how excited I am about graduating and then going to graduate school. I’m also feeling really positive about having to write my personal statement, my letter of intent, my declarations of the why’s and how comes. While I may not be one hundred and ten percent sure what I am going to do with a Masters (or potentially more), I think it likely that I will consider teaching creative writing at a college level. So I’ve found my niche of intent, my little corner where I’m comfortable saying what direction I am facing.

    I’ve always enjoyed teaching and I’m comfortable with the idea of teaching college level students. Its really only the moody teens that I don’t care for when it comes to teaching. I know that M.F.A.s are the way to go as far as getting into creative writing for a teaching career. But, ultimately, I’m going to pick the school that seems most suitable to me. I know some of the schools I have been looking at are a bit higher end, so it is very possible that I won’ t get into some of them. I’m preparing myself far in advanced for rejection. Its an emotional blow and I don’t want to be caught off balance. I want to be realistic. Doesn’t mean that I won’t try, I just won’t get my hopes up. Well they’re already up. Okay so I won’t let them get unrealistically high.

    One of my biggest hopes for grad school is potentially getting out of the states. I’ve been looking at some schools overseas and picked a couple that I thought had good sounding programs. I am definitely going to get in touch with their international contacts for those universities this summer and start figuring out the details of how international education works and if I’m even eligible to make it into their program. A plus a bout some of the grad programs I found overseas is that they are for one full year. So I’d basically go to school for the entire year without the summer break or anything like that. Which I’m fine with since I wouldn’t really be able to work. I really want this. If all the overseas universities I apply to reject me, I’ll be heartbroken.

    My mom on the other hand is freaking out a bit at the thought of me being so far away. Especially since she has a fear of flying and is clausterphobic (which means cramped crowded planes are tough) She is happy that I want to go out there and live life away from them. She thinks it is healthier than staying tucked away by your parents. Sometimes my mom is such an oxymoron. She was obsessive about not letting me stray too far from home as a kid and even when I was older, but she’s kinda sort of okay with me moving halfway across the world. Or she at least says she is.

    Another reason I like the idea of going overseas and not having to work while I’m there….it means I have more time to focus on my writing. Which is thrilling. Of course I’ll be doing my grad work as well, but still…minus a forty-hour-a-week job…I’m guessing that might open up a little more time. And plus if I’m going for creative writing then naturally, I’d hope, I’ll be doing more writing. Just the thought makes me squirm. I feel like my head has been so convoluted with everything else in life lately that my writing has been on the back burner, plus some other things that have factored into my dry spell as well. So the chance to take a break from the 9-5 life of work sounds amazing. Not that I don’t expect to work hard and be busy with school, because I do, but it’ll still be nice not have to worry about work and such. Unless I can’t afford schooling and then I’d have to apply for a work visa and work at most twenty hours a week. And I’m okay with that too.


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